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After two months' touring we understood that travelling, working and living in Africa is motivated by three things: it is a way to relieve guilt, an opportunity to gaze at wild animals or to get kudos as a seasoned traveller.

The possible dangers of travelling in Africa were discussed every time when we saw other travellers and locals. Here and there you will be mugged, might get malaria, or meet natives practising cannibalism. When returning from Africa, these same fearsome travellers become heroes in the eyes of others.

You Have Everything—We Have Nothing

One of most vexing things for us in the East and South Africa was the relationship between white and black people, or the rich and the poor. A common presumption is that all whites are wealthy and they come to Africa just to share their money with locals. This mentality applies to all interaction including begging, selling, renting, transportation, and robbing. According to African logic, the rich should have a bad conscience for having materially so much more than the poor. Besides, white people belong to the bad Colonialist race and must pay for their heritage. If you resist, things get complicated, and even if you give something to locals, you mustn't expect any gratitude. You are just doing what you are supposed to do, fulfilling your part of the deal.

We encountered racism towards white people and tourists for the first time in Brazil in the beginning of our trip. Beggars approached us demanding a cigarette or some money on the grounds of our race and status as travellers. We didn't give them anything nor did we do any spontaneous charity or volunteering in Africa. We are not compassionate enough to be thankful for being hassled.

The mentality was ever present and annoying. When getting approached by a gang of bad-smelling and dirty hawkers trying to touch us and staring at us angrily, someone less courageous might have interpreted their marketing effort to be a threatening situation or even a robbery, and given up his or her valuables to avoid further inconvenience. This was a very common situation in the areas where we travelled. People were more aggressive in the touristy places which always attract fortune-seekers. South Africa and the capital of Botswana were a bit different because they are more developed, but on the other hand the price level was even higher than in the neighbouring countries and value lower. In a world-wide scale, Africa is the low-value-leader while Asia is its high-value opposite.

If you don't have riches or a guilty conscience, you might feel sick and tired after travelling a while in Africa. The greed and open exploitation was far more prominent in East Africa than in any other country we have visited. But for the sake of fairness, it is important to realize that it is—to some extent—part of the tourist scene everywhere in the world.

Volunteers, Charities And Missionaries

Many people travel to Africa to show off how great and caring they are. They become volunteers or start a charity to help and spread the Western gospel of consumerism to ignorant natives just like missionaries did in the old days. Having a nice car and a mobile phone seem to be strict necessities for Africans even if they live in a house build from cow dung and without running water. Polluting is in today's world a privilege and it defines your value as a human being. The more you buy, the better person you become.

Donating to the poor relieves guilt. It works the same way as giving money to a church. If you sin, you pay, and after the remission you are free to sin again. However, it is far cheaper and less polluting to get rid of your sins by going to a local church or to get an appointment with a psychologist than travelling to Africa.

Volunteering and charities continue the traditions of colonialism and slavery. Westerners think that as we come from the civilised world, we know everything better and must educate ignorant locals. It is also called patronising. In its worst form it makes locals objects and positions them as children who must listen quietly and obey. A curious detail is that the majority of travellers we saw were white women. Is the reason nurturing instinct?

Pestering Animals in Safari

Animal watching is another popular reason for a trip to Africa. Having photos with wild beasts on the background proves that you are not afraid. Travellers are naturally happy to pay safari organizers a lot to make sure that they are not in real danger because in fact they are afraid. Isn't this a strange way to demonstrate courage? We managed to see many wild animals just walking around and travelling by bus. We spotted monkeys, crocodiles, camels, zebras, rhinos, a giraffe and many other animals without chasing them.

If you really want to pester animals, you can do it easier in a local zoo. There the pitiful means of money-making are stuffed into small cells so that tourists can easily take photos. In Africa, you need to hire a driver to pursue the poor animals and corner them for photo shooting. For us, game parks, national parks and reserves are nothing but zoos, and Africans proved to be passionate animal-lovers only when they were making money. We saw many times locals throwing stones at stray dogs just for fun.

No Thanks To The Guilt And Zoo

Our original thought was to stop on the way and rent a flat for finishing our newest manuscript. We tried and failed. After that, we didn't find any suitable place with necessary facilities and at affordable price. For us mzungus, Africa is surprisingly dear, even more expensive than Europe except that we don't get any value for our money. What good is air-conditioning, hot water, fridge and TV if you don't have electricity?

After two months' touring, we were relieved of the puzzle of the fascination of Africa and also the compulsion to stay around any longer. We took a turn to Kuala Lumpur, Malaysia, to ponder our experiences, finish writing the manuscript and enjoy life. We might return to Africa later to explore the West and the North about which we have heard—once again—so many good things.

Grey And Developed Gaborone

The Intercape Mainliner was half empty when we boarded from Johannesburg. The trip went smoothly in a Western-style bus through northern countryside. The border formalities were quickly done and cost us nothing. The citizens of the European Union get a lavish 90-day entry permit.

Arriving to Gaborone included some hassle. The workers of the bus company offered to call taxis to take passengers to hotels. According to them, there were no hotels near the bus stop and it was dangerous to walk downtown at night. As we don't like taxis, we kindly turned down the offer and decided to have a look at the city ourselves.

In the bus stop one fellow passenger, a young Botswanan woman clinged on us asking for help. She said she was afraid of going around alone and asked if she could follow us. Soon she started to ask for money for taxi and tried to borrow our non-existent phone. We got rid of her, and after that found out that there was a hotel right around the corner, though an expensive one (80€). We found a more reasonably priced option with the help of local police. Still it was expensive, 45€, and included facilities we didn't use like satellite TV, fridge, air-con, hot water, telephone, and wifi. We just wanted to sleep but as it was raining and we were pretty tired, we stayed.

Later we found out that Gaborone lacks budget accommodation just like the rest of Africa. This little city of 500 000 inhabitants is built mainly for administration and business. It is pretty dull for sightseeing and the main attraction are the parliament houses.

The weather in Gaborone was chilly and rainy although it was summertime—much like in Europe. We wanted to continue onwards as soon as possible and with as few stops as possible because every stop in Africa means a lot of hassle: lurking pickpockets, touts, and hawkers. We bought tickets straight to Livingstone in Zambia with Gaborone-Lusaka Express which took off the same evening.

A Hurryless Express Bus

This time the bus was considerably downgraded. The seats were cramped: three seats on the one side, two seats the other. Also the roads started to deteriorate. It was raining the whole way and the bus was hydroplaning as the tires were in less than perfect condition. Inside was chilly and sweaty because of humidity. People were sneezing and coughing and of course we got a flu afterwards, too.

Despite the company's name “Gaborone-Lusaka Express”, the bus stopped in every little village and even in the middle of nowhere to let people out or to the toilet. The worst delay was in the border, though. First we waited for the border to open and after that for the next bus to arrive as there was another bus for the Zambian side. This took four hours after which we waited for the ferry to cross Zambesi River.

Livingstone Tourist Heaven

Our destination, the city of Livingstone was a one-hour-drive away from the Kazungula border. It was touristy because of nearby Victoria Falls that attract bungy jumpers and other fearless adventurers.

The small city centre is full of backpacker places, hotels and motels. We hadn't seen so many tourists on our trip - not even in Diani Beach in Kenya. Fortunately we could escape the rush to the countryside some twenty kilometres away from the city. We stayed in Crocodile Creek's peace and quiet sitting in the outside lounge and watching crocodiles to swim by. Quite a paradise and a perfect ending for our East and South Africa tour.

The local way of life differs considerably from European and South American. People are all the time aware and expecting the worse. There are stories about gangs taking over farms and houses, people getting killed for a car or a small amount of money, women being raped. Middle-class people hide behind barred windows and pay for protection to armed response services. Shops keep their doors closed even in broad daylight and shopkeepers reserve themselves a right to select their customers. In most cases this means that no black people are allowed to enter.

There is no respect for women. This is seen most clearly in the fact that nearly half of the female population has been raped. The problem is even more serious considering the HIV problem of the country. There are more HIV positives in South Africa than in any other country in the world. Approximately one third of the population is infected. Newspapers are full of death announcements of young people who have passed away either "peacefully" or "tragically". The median life expectancy is 27. Just figure it out.

Most South-Africans are racists and they do not hesitate to state it publicly. Those who claim not to be racists always add a "but" afterwards. No wonder, because most crimes are committed by black or coloured people who live in shanty towns. It is easy for us Europeans to say all races should be equal when we don't have to face any of these problems.

The racial variety of South-Africa is huge, much more than just whites and blacks. In the black side there are black Africans and coloured people including for example Malay Muslims and Mulattos. Even whites do not constitute a single group but are separated to Afrikaans white and English white people who don't have much in common. Both are a clear minority who are bound to be overrun by black and coloured people in the near future.

We stayed most of the time in Cape Town in a community-like hostel. There were six South-African residents, both coloured and white, who were living in the hostel permanently. Others were travellers staying from one night to several months. The atmosphere was liberal and pot was smoked openly. We had a good time together and we learned a lot about South-Africa - a lot more than visiting all kinds of tourist attractions.

The hostel had a roof-top terrace for barbecue (braai in Afrikaans) with a great view of the famous Table Mountain. We did barbecue last time in Kauniainen so it was nice to do it again. We bought kilos of chicken, beef, ribs, lamb, and pork. The South African red wine is by default very sweet so in the beginning we had a hard time finding anything suiting to our dry taste. We also visited Winelands in Stellenbosch for wine tasting and found out that the more expensive wine it was, the more sour and undrinkable it got. The worst was Pinotage, which was supposed to be the best. Santeri almost threw out that stuff.

We drove around Cape Town area after renting a car for three days. In Cape peninsula, namely Cape of Good Hope, we went to a couple of natural parks to see penguins, baboons, and lots of beautiful green bushes. There were supposed to be some zebras and other animals as well, but unfortunately it is always either bad weather or wrong time of the year to spot any. We saw a couple of zebras only after getting out of the natural park in some farmyard.

In fact, natural parks do not differ significantly from zoos in Europe. Animals are stuffed in a small place so that tourists could see as many different species as possible in a short time for money. Quite an abuse of animal rights for earning money. We also discovered that natural parks mean the same thing for South Africans as beaches for Brazilians and lively night life for Argentinians: they are national pride, used for luring and ripping off tourists, and are not so special in reality.

We are now happily back in Buenos Aires, our new home town. Still there will always be seven things we are going to miss in Cape Town: 1) Our great hippie community, 2) English language, 3) rooftop barbecue with Table Mountain view, 4) hot chili sauce called peri-peri, 5) bottomless cups of coffee, 6) affordable single-malt whiskies and 7) drinkable and good-tasting tap water. Price level was about half cheaper than in Finland and two times more expensive than Buenos Aires. All in all, we are happy we went there but do not miss back.